Why is loving so goddamn difficult, scary, and undervalued?
Why is it that once you say it, the life expectancy of the feeling, is depicted solely upon actions, and not just what you say, or how many times you say it? Why is love only categorized by a person's actions, and not overall by what they think, feel, say AND do? Why is love so scary, so intimidating, so overwhelming?
You want it so intensely, but then start to doubt it's capabilities, it's overall outcomes.
Love isn't just a four letter word, but an uttered commitment to sacrifices, schedules, feelings, thoughts, and actions. You love your partner's good days, bad moods, unspoken feelings and thoughts. You love their demons, their darknesses, their uninterrupted spirits. You love their shitty dispositions, their unexpected and shifted energies....it's a lot yo choose to commit to. Makes you wonder if it's really worth it.
No one tells you that love is more than an "unconditional" feeling. Love is a choice. Love is more than what feels good at THAT moment. Love is nothing but daily sacrifices, and long term positive goals.
Love is NOT for the weak. Love is not a game. Love is NOT for those to just say. It's a word you wake up every day choosing to do right by.
Love can be a beautiful blessing in disguise. Especially when you have had the worst. There is nothing to gain from it, more than positivity, hope, and realness, from the RIGHT person. It's a teaching tool. To love someone is to see them in every season, willingly. Good, great, bad, the worst, up down, poor, rich, with, without. f you can withstand the storms, then you deserve to celebrate the blessings after each storm. It's not easy. Its not perfect. It's nowhere near what fairytales depict, but it is WORTH it.
Just gotta find the one willing to withstand the fight with you.